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Screwed by Jonathan Coulton Screwed Tuning:E A D G B E Capo:no capo Chord List in order of appearance: G C A7 D C/G B7 Em Am7 D7 C#m7b5 Dsus4 e|--3---0---0---2---3---2---0----0---2-----------3---| B|--0---1---2---3---1---0---0----1---1----5------3---| G|--0---0---0---2---0---2---0----0---2----4------2---| D|--0---2---2---0---2---1---2----2---0----5------0---| A|--2---3---0-------x---2---2----0--------4----------| E|--3---------------3-------0------------------------| I've also tabbed out the little fills he does and labelled them figure 1 and figure 2. (fig.1) (fig.2) e|-------------3---|-----3----3--3----| B|---------1---0---|---0-1----0--0----| G|---------0---0---|---0-0----0--0----| D|--0h2p0--2---0---|---0-2----0--0----| A|-----------------|------------------| E|-----------------|----------3-------| Thats all you need, now heres the song. G C A7 D G C/G G G C A7 D G C A7 D Some dumb Indian sold Manhattan for Seven bucks and a bottle of booze G C A7 D G C G Went out drinking and came home sober and Told his friends the good news G C A7 D G C A7 D Bernadette saw the Virgin Mary but No one else could and everyone tried G C A7 D G C G All her friends said that she'd gone crazy, she Joined a convent and died B7 Em B7 Em I'm the Indian, I am Bernadette D G D G I'm the sucker who doesn't know it yet B7 Em B7 Em I just signed it, I never reviewed A7 Am7 All the fine print you wrote out D7 Now I guess I'm G C A7 D screwed G C/G G G C A7 D G C A7 D Indiana Jones liked to travel, he Took his friend on a treasure hunt trip G C A7 D G C G Did a favor, threw him the idol but Never got back his whip G C A7 D G C A7 D Boba Fett was a bounty hunter, he Did his job well, he brought back his man G C A7 D G C G He was clutching his unspent money when he Fell down a hole in the sand B7 Em B7 Em I am Dr. Jones, I am Boba Fett D G D G I'm the sucker who doesn't know it yet B7 Em B7 Em I just signed it, I never reviewed A7 Am7 All the fine print you wrote out D7 Now I guess I'm G C A7 D screwed G C/G G C#m7b5 G (Fig.1) C#m7b5 G (Fig.2) It's bad news for me again, It never ends C#m7b5 G D Dsus4 D I got no prize inside my Happy Meal C#m7b5 G C#m7b5 G (Fig.1) I got lots of money, I got lots of friends C#m7b5 G D Dsus4 D Just like Meatloaf got a record deal G C A7 D G C A7 D Alexander Graham Bell made telephones, His friend Watson was out all the time G C A7 D G C G Called him up just to chat, nobody home, Never got back his dime G C A7 D G C A7 D Once upon a time France was beautiful, Had a queen who gave everyone cake G C A7 D G C G Then the people got mad and killed her dead, Took back all they could take B7 Em B7 Em I am Graham Bell, Marie Antionette D G D G I'm the sucker who doesn't know it yet B7 Em B7 Em I just signed it, I never reviewed A7 Am7 All the fine print you wrote out D7 Now I guess I'm G C A7 D screwed G C/G G Guitar Tab Legend: h - Hammer on p - Pull off x - finger mute (fretboard hand) -------