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In Different Ways by Jon Lajoie
In Different Ways
Capo:no capo
A C#M F#M D E
I can see it in your eyes, girl, that you're in the mood for love
So I'll light some candles, pour some wine, let's sit down on the rug
But there\'s something I must tell you, babe, before we take this step
Something about me, girl, that you do not know yet
A C#M F#M D E
I have no penis. It was torn off
In a bicycle accident in 1999.
I also lost one testicle so all I have is a weird uni-ball
And a rubber tube between my legs
But babe, I can love you in different ways
I'll make love to you with the rubber tube that I use for urinating
And I'll tape two Popsicle sticks to it to make it easier for penetrating
And having only one ball isn\'t always a bad thing
It's like a pool ball in a pillowcase, it's like a cherry on a sundae
A C#M F#M D E
Because, girl, I have no penis. It was torn off
In a bicycle accident in 1999.
I also lost one testicle so all I have is a weird uni-ball
And a rubber tube between my legs
But, babe, I can love you in different ways.
------------------
version 2
Capo:no capo
A A7
A
I can see it in your eyes girl
C#m
That you're in the mood for love
F#m
So I light some candles, pour some wine
D E
Come sit down on the rug
A
But there's something I must tell you, babe
C#m
Before we take this step
F#m
Something about me girl
D E
That you do not know yet
A A7
I have no penis
It was torn off
D
In a bicycle accident
A
In nineteen ninety nine
E
I also lost one testicle
D
So all I have is a weird uni-ball
A
And a rubber tube, between my legs
E A
But babe, I can love you in different ways
A A7
A
I'll make love to you with the rubber tube
C#m
That I use for urinating
F#m
I'll just tape to Popsicle sticks around it
D E
Make it easier for penetrating
A
And having only one ball
C#m
Isn't always a bad thing
F#m
It's like a pool ball in a pillow case
D E
It's like a cherry on a sundae
'Cause girl
A
I have no penis
A7
I have no cock
D
If it looks like I have a ball
A
Just 'cause I stuff it with a sock
E
Girl, I know that you're afraid
D
But I promise, baby, if you stay
A
That I'll put a cucumber in the microwave
E
And babe, I will love you in different...
AAADDAAADD
... ways
A
Just because I don't have cock
D A
It doesn't mean I can't rock
A
Just because I don't have cock
A D
It doesn't mean I can't rock
D A
O-o-oh yeah
------------------
version 3
Tuning:E A D G B E
Capo:no capo
Melody:
--------------------0---------|
-2--2---2--5--3--2--2---------|
-2--2h4-2-----------1----X2---|
-2--2---------------2---------|
-0--0---------------0---------|
------------------------------|
Verses:
-0---4---2---2--0---|
-2---5---2---3--0---|
-2---6---2---2--1---| X 2
-2---6---4---0--2---|
-0---4---4------2---|
---------2------0---|
Chorus:
I have no...
-0---0---2--0------------------------|
-2---2---3--2------------------------|
-2---1---2--2------------------------|
-2---2---0--2------------------------|
-0---0------0------------------------|
-------------------------------------|
I also lost...
-0--2--0--------0-----0-----|
-0--3--2--------0-----2-----|
-1--2--2--------1-----2-----|
-2--0--2--------2-----2-----|
-2-----0--------2-----0-----|
-0--------------0-----------|
MELODY: (A Amaj7)
VERSE
CHORUS
(Distorted Tone)
... ways
------------------|
-----------7-7----|
-6-6-6-6-6-7-7----|
-7-7-7-7-7-7-7----| Repeat
-7-7-7-7-7-5-5----|
-5-5-5-5-5--------|
Don't be fooled by my lack of a cock
D
I'm still Johnny from the Block
A
O-o-oh yeah
I can see it in your eyes girl
That you're in the mood for love
So I light some candles, pour some wine
Come sit down on the rug
But there's something I must tell you, babe
Before we take this step
Something about me girl
That you do not know yet
I have no penis
It was torn off
In a bicycle accident
In nineteen ninety nine
I also lost one testicle
So all I have is a weird uni-ball
And a rubber tube, between my legs
But babe, I can love you in different ways
I'll make love to you with the rubber tube
That I use for urinating
I'll just tape two Popsicle sticks around it
Make it easier for penetrating
And having only one ball
Isn't always a bad thing
It's like a pool ball in a pillow case
It's like a cherry on a sundae
'Cause girl
I have no penis
I have no cock
If it looks like I have a ball
Just 'cause I stuff it with a sock
Girl, I know that you're afraid
But I promise, baby, if you stay
I'll put a cucumber in the microwave
And babe, I will love you in different...
...ways
Just because I don't have a cock
It doesn't mean I can't rock
Just because I don't have a cock
It doesn't mean I can't rock
Just because I don't have a cock
It doesn't mean I can't rock
Don't be fooled by my lack of a cock
I'm still Johny from the block
O-o-oh yeah
-------------