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On Again On Again by Jake Thackray
On Again On Again
[Intro]
E A E A
[Verse 1]
E A
I love a good bum on a woman it makes my day
E A
To me it is palpable proof of God’s existence a Posteriori
G F# Bm
Also I love breasts and arms and ankles, elbows, knees
E E7 A
It’s the tongue, the tongue, the tongue on a woman that spoils the job for me.
[Verse 2]
E A
Please understand I respect and admire the frailer sex
E A
And I honour them every bit as much as the next misogynist
G F# Bm
But give some women the ghost of a chance to talk and there upon
E E7 A E A E A
They go on again, on again, on again, on again, on again, on again on.
[Verse 3]
E A
I fell in love with a woman with wonderful thighs and hips
E A
And a sensational belly; I just never noticed her lips were always moving
G F# Bm
Only when we got to the altar and she had to say “I do”
E E7 A
And she folded her arms and gathered herself and took in a breath and I knew.
[Verse 4]
E A E
She could have gone on again, on again, on again till the entire congregation passed out
A
And the vicar passed on, and the choir boys passed through puberty
G F# Bm
At the reception I gloomily noted her family’s jubilant mood
E E7 A E A E A
Their maniacal laughter and their ghastly gratitude.
[Verse 5]
E A
She talks to me when I go for a shave or a sleep or a swim
E A
She talks to me on a Sunday when I go singing hymns, and drinking heavily
G F# Bm
When I go mending my chimney pots she’s down there in the street
E E7 A
And at ninety-five on my motorbike she’s on the pillion seat
[Verse 6]
E A
Wittering on again, on again, on and again and again
E A
When I’m eating or drinking or reading or thinking or when I’m saying my rosary
G F# Bm
She will never stop talking to me she is one of those women who
E E7 A E A E A
Will never use three or four words when a couple of thousand will easily do.
[Verse 7]
E A
She also talks without stopping to me in our bed of a night
E A
Throughout the sweetest of our intimate delights she never gives over
G F# Bm
Not even stopping while we go hammer and tongs towards the peak
E E7 A
Except maybe for a sigh and a groan, and one perfunctory shriek
[Verse 8]
E A
Then she goes on again, on again, on again, on and I must
E A
Assume that she has never noticed that she’s just been interrupted
G F# Bm
Totally unruffled she is and as far as I can see
E E7 A E A E A
I might just as well have been posting a letter or stirring up the tea.
[Verse 9]
E A
She will not take a hint not once she’s made a start
E A
I can yawn or belch or bleed or faint or fart, she’ll not drop a syllable
G F# Bm
I could stand in front of her grimly sharpening up an axe
E E7 A
I could sprinkle her with paraffin and ask her for a match
[Verse 10]
E A
She’d just go on again, on again, on again even more
E A
The hind leg of a donkey is peanuts for her; she can bore the balls off a buffalo
G F# Bm
“Mother of God” I cried one day “Oh let your kingdom come
E E7 A E A E A
And in the meantime Mother could you strike this bugger dumb?”
[Verse 11]
E A
Well believe it or not she appeared to me then and there
E A
The blessed Virgin herself in answer to my prayer, despite the vulgarity
G F# Bm
Shimmering softly, dressed in blue and holding up a hand
E E7 A
I cocked a pious ear as the Mother of God began
[Verse 12]
E A
But she went on again, on again, on again, on and I
E A
Will have to state how very much I sympathise with the rest of the family
G F# Bm
Give some women the ghost of a chance to talk and thereupon
E E7 E
They’ll go on again, on again, on again, on again,
E7 E E7 E E7
And again, and again, and again, and again
E A Am A A6
They will go on again, on again, on again, on again, on again, on again, on.
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