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They Ain't Making Jews Like Jesus Anymore by Kinky Friedman







      They Ain't Making Jews Like Jesus Anymore 









       G                 C                 D                    G
Well a redneck nerd in a bowling shirt was a-guzzlin' Lone Star beer
        G              C            D                G
Talkin' religion and a-politics for all the world to hear
             G                                C
"They oughta send you back to Russia, boy, or New York City one,
     D                                                             G
You just want to doodle a Christian girl and you killed God's only son"
 
 
      G                                     C
I said "has it occurred to you, you nerd, that that's not very nice?
    D                                               G
We Jews believe it was Santa Claus who killed Jesus Christ"
     G                                     C
"You know you don't look Jewish," he said, "Near as I could figure"
   D                                                           G
"I had you lamped for a slightly anaemic, well-dressed country n****r"
 
 
    G                           D7
Now they ain't making Jews like Jesus anymore
D7                                  C               G
They don't turn the other cheek the way they done before
   G                                           C
He started into shouting and a spitting on the floor
      G                           D        G
Lord, they ain't making Jews like Jesus anymore
 
 
      G                                              C
He says, "I ain't a racist, but Aristitle Onassis is one Greek we don't need"
      D                                               G
"Them n****rs, Jews and Sigma Nus all they ever do is breed"
     G                                       C
"Now wops and micks and slopes and spics and spooks are on my list
             D
"And there's one little hebe from the heart of Texas.
 
Is there anyone I missed?"
 
 
       G                                    C
Well I hits him with everything I had right square between the eyes
        D                                                                G
I says "I'm gonna get you, you son of a b***h, you spouting that pack of lies
     G                                      C
"If there's one thing I can't abide it's an ethnocentric racist"
     D                                                  G
"Now you take back that thing you said about Aristitle Onassis"
 
 
    G                           D7
Now they ain't making Jews like Jesus anymore
D7                                C               G
We don't turn the other cheek the way they done before
   G                                                     C
You could hear that honky holler as he hit that hardwood floor
          G                           D        G
Lord They sure ain't making Jews like Jesus anymore








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