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The Tomato Vendetta by Mason Williams The Tomato Vendetta [Intro] D A D A [Verse 1] D This song’s about the Tomato Vendetta, A and the tale of a man who let a D Hate for tomatoes cause him strife, A D He lost his job, wife, home, car, kids, and life. [Bridge 1] D7 He’d go downtown to buy some groceries, G He went because his family was hungry, D He always bought red meat and potatoes A D But he wouldn’t touch those ugly tomatoes… [Verse 2] D He didn’t know why he hated tomatoes, A They were just as ugly as far as ugly goes, D There in the store, when no-one was watchin’, A D He’d set melons on them and laugh at their squashin’. [Bridge 2] D7 One night after shopping and on his way home, G His loathing for tomatoes cut to the bone, D He just couldn’t stand the strain any more, A D He vowed to destroy the Tomato Horde. [Verse 3] D He turned around, and viciously hopin’ A The grocery stores would still be open, Bm His eyes grew cold, for he was a man, A D Whose Moment of Truth lay close at hand. [Bridge 3] D7 All over town, in every store, G Tomatoes were hurt and spilled on the floor, D Big melons, and turkeys, and large sacks of grits, A D Were dumped on their sections to mash them to bits. [Verse 4] D At the last store he finished his plan, A But on his way out, a delivery van, D Full of big ripe Tomatoes drove in and hit him, A D Tomato Vendetta had claimed its victim. [Bridge 4] D7 The incident of the Tomato Vendetta, G Caused a sensation that was something that the D Public could relish, and readily snatch-up, A Popularly known as the tomato ketchup… [Outro] D A D A D -------------