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Deteriorata by National Lampoon
Deteriorata
[Intro]
N.C.
You are a fluke of the universe. You have no right to be here.
F#5 G5 F# F# G5 F#
Deteriorata. Deteriorata.
G, D7sus4/G, G, D7sus4/G
[Verse 1]
G
Go placidly amid the noise and waste,
D7sus4/G C
And remember what comfort there may be in owning a piece thereof.
Am
Avoid quiet and passive persons, unless you are in need of sleep.
D
Rotate your tires.
Em
Speak glowingly of those greater than yourself,
C
And heed well their advice, even though they be turkeys.
D
Know what to kiss, and when.
Am Em Am
Consider that two wrongs never make a right, but that three do.
C
Wherever possible, put people on hold.
D
Be comforted that in the face of all aridity and disillusionment,
G
And despite the changing fortunes of time,
D7sus4/G
There is always a big future in computer maintenance.
[Chorus 1]
F C
You are a fluke of the universe
D
You have no right to be here
A#
And whether you can hear it or not,
A G E
The universe is laughing behind your back
[Verse 2]
F C
Remember The Pueblo.
D A#
Strive at all times to bend, fold, spindle, and mutilate.
A G E
Know yourself. If you need help, call the FBI.
G
Exercise caution in your daily affairs, especially with those persons closest to you -
D7sus4/G
That lemon on your left, for instance.
C Am
Be assured that a walk through the ocean of most souls would scarcely get your feet wet.
D Em
Fall not in love therefore. It will stick to your face.
C
Gracefully surrender the things of youth: birds, clean air, tuna, Taiwan.
D
And let not the sands of time get in your lunch.
Am
Hire people with hooks.
Em Am C
For a good time, call 606-4311. Ask for Ken.
D
Take heart in the bedeepening gloom that your dog is finally getting enough cheese.
G
And reflect that whatever misfortune may be your lot,
D7sus4/G
It could only be worse in Milwaukee.
[Chorus 2]
F C
You are a fluke of the universe (You are a fluke of the universe)
D
You have no right to be here (You have no right to be here)
A#
And whether you can hear it or not, (And whether you can hear it or not)
A G E
The universe is laughing behind your back (The universe is laughing behind your back)
[Verse 3]
F C
Therefore, make peace with your god,
D A#
Whatever you perceive him to be - hairy thunderer, or cosmic muffin.
A G E
With all its hopes, dreams, promises, and urban renewal,
E
The world continues to deteriorate.
N.C.
Give up!
[Chorus]
F C
You are a fluke of the universe
D
You have no right to be here
A#
And whether you can hear it or not,
A G E
The universe is laughing behind your back (repeat to fade)
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