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Fat Children by Tim Minchin
Fat Children
Am G F Em
Do not feed doughnuts to your obese children
Am G F Em
You will regret it when they™re in their teens
Am G F Em
Maccas might shut them up now that they™re seven
F
But they won™t forgive you, when
Em Am
They™re getting picked last for PE
Bm7
Don™t you see?
Am
Boombalata motherfucker
D9 Dm
Have you noticed that your kids are fat?
Am D7
What are you going to do about that?
Am
What are you going to do?
Am D7
So you telling me that your family
Am D7
Has a history of obesity
Am D7
You got a polycystic ovary
Am D7
It™s just the way that God made me
Am D7
It™s unlikely, statistically
Am
To be a physical thing
D7
But either way it don™t explain why you
Am
Are in the cue at Burger King
Am D7
You can blame it on biology
Am D7
You can blame your physiology
Am D7
You can point to genealogy
Am D7
And your social anthropology
Am D7
You can say you are an ectomorph
Am D7
That you just can™t get the kilos off
Bm7
Well you can be what you wanna be
E7
But stop feeding that boy KFC
F
He weighs 40 kilos and he™s only three
Bm7 E7
He looks like a clean-shaven Pavarotti
F C
Switching to Diet Coke is not the way back
G
Boombalata kiddie-stuffer
D
Your kid™s a fat, have you noticed that?
Am F G
And you oughta be ashamed
Am F G
For you only have yourself to blame.
F C
Your 5 year old princess in her size 14 tutu
G D E7
Only eats pizza like that because you do
C
Will be dead of a heart attack
G C G
Before your grandchildren are ten
C
Perhaps you™ll consider
G C G
A cut-back on extra fries then
Am
Boombalata kiddie-stuffer
D9 Dm
Have you noticed that your kids are fat?
Am D7
What are you going to do about that?
Am
What are you going to do?
Am D7
So you telling me that your family
Am D7
Has a history of obesity
Am D7
You got a polycystic ovary
Am D7
It™s just the way that God made me
Am D7
But “ and in your case
Am D7
There™s a reasonably big butt
Am D7
Do you think it™s an appropriate treat
Am D7
The all-you-can-eat at Pizza Hut?
Am D7
There™s no excuse you silly goose
Am D7
For a child with a caboose
Am D7
Like a moose who™s eaten too much mousse
Am D7
It™s tantamount to child abuse
Am D7
Kick them off the fucking couch
Am D7
Unplug the Playstation
Am D7
Send them down to the park
Am D7
If they don™t wanna go, make ™em
Am D7
Tell them they have to jog
Am D7
Until their jogging shorts fit™em
Am D7
If they hesitate, ask firmly
Am
If they still resist, hit™em
F C
Is this what you want for your little girl and guy?
G D
These chips off the pork chop, for the toffee apples of your eye?
F C
Six packs of kit cats are not the way back
G
Boombalata Kiddie-Stuffer
D
Your kids are fat, did ya notice that?
Am F G
And you, you ought to be ashamed
Am F G
For you have only got yourself to blame
F C
Your 6 year old miniature Jabba the Hut
G D
Eating half melted Mars Bars from the folds of his gut
C
He'll be dead of an aneurysm
G C G
Before his own children ism ten
C
Perhaps you™ll consider
G C G
A cut-back on Taco Bell then
C
Perhaps you™ll consider
G C
A cut-back on Krispy Kreme doughnuts
G
And Popcorn in bucket-sized boxes
C G
And microwave pizza or drive through McDonalds
C G
For weeknightly dinners in front of the TV
C G
And notes to the phys-ed instructor saying
C G
Timmy has asthma but he really just gets short of breath
C G
Cos he™s 35 kilos above the ideal weight
C G C
Of 35 kilos for a nine year old boy
---------------
version 2
Am G F E7
Do not feed doughnuts to your obese children
Am G F E7
You will regret it when theyre in their teens
Am G F E7
Maccas might shut them up now that theyre seven
F
But they wont forgive you, when
Dm Am7
Theyre getting picked last for PE
E7
Dont you see?
Am
Boombalata motherfucker
D9 Dm
Have you noticed that your kids are fat?
Am D7
What are you going to do about that?
D7
What are you going to do?
Am D7
So you telling me that your family
Am D7
Has a history of obesity
Am D7
You got a polycystic ovary
Am7 D7
Its just the way that God made me
E Em7
Its unlikely, statistically
D7
To be a physical thing
E7 E7/B
But either way it dont explain why you
E7
Are in the cue at Burger King
Am Am/D
You can blame it on biology
G G/D
You can blame your physiology
Am Am/D
You can point to genealogy
G G/D
And your social anthropology
Am
You can say you are an ectomorph
Gaug
That you just cant get the kilos off
Bm
Well you can be what you wanna be
E7
But stop feeding that boy KFC
F
He weighs 40 kilos and hes only three
B7 E7
He looks like a clean-shaven Pavarotti
F C
Ordering to Diet Coke is not the way back
G
Boombalata kiddie-stuffer
D E7
Your kids a fat, have you noticed that?
Am F G
And you oughta be ashamed
Am7 F G
For you only have yourself to blame.
F C G
Your 5 year old princess in her size 14 tutu
F G
Only eats pizza like that because you do
F
She'lll be dead of a heart attack
G C G F G
Before your grandchildren are ten
F
Perhaps you™ll consider
G C E7
A cut-back on extra fries then
Am
Boombalata kiddie-stuffer
D9 Dm
Your kids are fat, have you noticed that
Am
What are you going to do about that?
D7
What are you going to do?
Am D7
So you telling me that your family
Am D7
Has a history of obesity
Am D7
You got a polycystic ovary
Am7 D7
Your mum had childhood diabetes
Am7 Am7
But - and in your case
D7
There's a reasonably big butt
Am7
Do you think it's an appropriate treat
E7
The all-you-can-eat at Pizza Hut?
Am Am/Ab
There™s no excuse you silly goose
Am/G Am/Gb
For a child with a caboose
Am
Like a moose who™s eaten too much mousse
D D7
It™s tantamount to child abuse
Am
Kick them off the fucking couch
G G/Em
Unplug the Playstation
Am
Send them down to the park
G G7
If they don™t wanna go, make ™em
Em
Tell them they have to jog
D7
Until their jogging shorts fit™em
D
If they hesitate, ask firmly
G Ab
If they still resist, hit™em
F C
Is this what you want for your little girl and guy?
G D
These chips off the pork chop, for the toffee apples of your eye?
F C
Six packs of kit cats are not the way back
G
Boombalata Kiddie-Stuffer
D E7
Your kids are fat, did ya notice that?
Am F G
And you ought to be ashamed
Am F G
For you have only have yourself to blame
C G
Your 6 year old miniature Jabba the Hut
C G
Eating half melted Mars Bars from the folds of his gut
F
He'll be dead of an aneurysm
G C G F G
Before his own children ism ten
F
Perhaps you™ll consider
G C G F G
A cut-back on Taco Bell then
F
Perhaps you™ll consider
G F
A cut-back on Krispy Kreme doughnuts
G
And Popcorn in bucket-sized boxes
F G
And microwave pizza or drive through McDonalds
F G
For weeknightly dinners in front of the TV
F G
And notes to the phys-ed instructor saying timmy has
F G
Asthma but he really just gets short of breath
F G
Cus he™s 35 kilos above the ideal weight
F G C
Of 35 kilos for a nine year old boy
---------